I Can't Stop Thinking About Laurie's White Lotus Ending

And not just because Carrie Coon acted the hell out of that speech

While watching The White Lotus this season, I couldn’t help but typecast myself against the ladies. You know the deal: I’m a Charlotte, I’m a Marnie, whatever. This time? I’m a Kate (though not politically, and a bob does nothing for me). But I am a long-time admirer of the Lauries of the world, the ones who don’t take bullshit as an answer and are happy to speak up at dinner to explain to the waiter that no, it isn’t acceptable that the calamari came out cold and yes, you need to do something to make this right.

Maybe that’s why I was rooting for Laurie in a way that I wasn’t for Jaclyn (the center of attention, the infectious personality, the big idea person) or Kate (the supporter, the one that molds into any situation, the excellent gossip). Laurie was the only one equipped to look at the toxic dynamic that had bred across her friends and say: “Look, this isn’t it.”

But that’s not what happened.

At dinner on the final night of the trip, Laurie says:

“It's funny because if I'm being honest, all week I've just been so sad. I just feel like my expectations were too high, or...I just feel like, as you get older you have to justify your life, you know. And your choices. And when I'm with you guys it's just like...so transparent what my choices were. And my mistakes. I have no belief system, and I...well I mean I've had a lot of them, but...I mean work was my religion for forever, but I definitely lost my belief there. And then, and then I tried love, but that was just a painful religion that made everything worse. And then even for me, just like being a mother, that didn't save me either. But I had this epiphany today: I don't need religion or God to give my life meaning. Because time gives it meaning. We, we started this life together. I mean we're going through it apart but we're still together, and I, I look at you guys, and it feels meaningful. And I can't explain it, but even when we're sitting around the pool talking about whatever inane shit, it feels very fucking deep. I'm glad you have a beautiful face. And I'm glad that you have a beautiful life. And I'm just happy to be at the table.”

(sidenote - shoutout to my fellow Kates who may not have beautiful faces but work really, really hard on building beautiful lives)

It’s a breathtaking speech, and Carrie Coon delivered it with so much emotion that I had to look away from the screen a few times. But how did we get from point A:

To point B: “I’m glad you have a beautiful life”?

I mean, I’ve never slept with a Russian scammer (and I’m assuming you haven’t either), but let’s pretend. Let’s pretend you find yourself in the situation where you finally break free from your toxic friends who have been treating you like crap for a week, sit ringside for some unregulated fighting, go home with a stranger, and then that person asks you for payment via “Venmo? CashApp? Zelle?” just before his girlfriend bursts in. Oh, and then on your way out the window you realize he may have robbed your hotel.

If this had happened to Samantha/Jessa, this situation would have been nothing more than fodder for a good story. But there is no Samantha/Jessa at The White Lotus. This happened to Laurie.

And Laurie is already questioning the choices she’s made, as she says in her speech:

“And when I'm with you guys it's just like...so transparent what my choices were.”

But…were her choices bad? Let’s compare her to Jaclyn, who also just slept with a Russian scammer (while married!) and who works in the historically very-stable entertainment industry (/s). Sure, Laurie’s job and marriage didn’t work out the way she wanted. Will Jaclyn’s? Perhaps Laurie’s struggle isn’t that she’s struggling, it’s just that she’s the only one of her friends that can be honest about it.

So Laurie tells her friends off, then has her wild night out, then spirals because of it. And then she sees her friends taking pictures at the edge of the infinity pool and thinks…what?

And I'm just happy to be at the table.

That’s how you’re feeling after all of this? That’s how you’re feeling about your longest friendships? That for all of the flaws, for the drama, for the gossiping and alliances and general not-being-a-girl’s-girl of it…it’s enough to just be there?

As a Kate, I understand this line of thinking. Sure, these friends are self-absorbed and passive aggressive and have overtly excluded you throughout the trip, but they’re your lifelong friends! Who does it hurt to maintain a good relationship? I’ve never in my life intentionally ended a friendship - is that a character flaw? Or is it a sign of maturity to recognize people are who they are, and that it’s natural that as people grow their friendships can blossom, or need pruning, or straight-up die - and that it’s okay to quietly tear out a dead plant?

I don’t know, and we’re not here to adjudicate my/Charlotte/Marnie/Kate’s life choices!! We’re here to talk about Laurie.

I was rooting for her when she called out her friends for their bad behavior. I wanted her to say the thing. To say they’d all outgrown each other, and that she’d always treasure the memories, but that she was going to leave the group chat. And then she would move on.

But NO!! This is the opposite of what happens. In the next scene we see the three of them closer than ever (?), drinking wine and sharing chairs and laughing like the old friends that they are. Laurie was at the brink of something, and then she stepped back.

When I first heard Laurie say, “I don't need religion or God to give my life meaning. Because time gives it meaning,” I almost paused my TV (but didn’t because heaven forbid I fall behind on the FeedMe White Lotus live chat). Was there truth to that statement? Why did it feel off to me?

Time is an investment. A sunk cost. Something you can never get back. You can spend a lot of time building a business, or writing a book, or creating a relationship, but that doesn’t make it a good one. Time certainly matters, but it isn’t what determines if something is worthy or good. Sometimes time is just a weak justification. It can be a copout.

And that’s why I’m sad about Laurie’s ending. She’s spent so much time with these friends, building these relationships. But (apologies in advance, this phrase annoys me but I can’t think of a better one) - do these friendships still serve her? Laurie says, “And when I'm with you guys it's just like...so transparent what my choices were.” She’s still making choices. She’s accepting something that, without the time she’s already invested, would be unacceptable.

I’m not trying to oversimplify the complexities of relationships - they’re rarely as black and white as the internet would want you to think. It’s easy to post that you’d cut someone out of your life who had a differing political opinion, it’s harder when it’s your dad. Where do you draw the line? And should we be drawing lines like these anyways?

I don’t think so. People are nuanced. I accept certain things from some of my friends that I don’t from others. I judge people differently based on their backgrounds, their families, where they live, who they work with. I think everyone, to some degree, grades on a curve.

So. Laurie. Or rather, Mike White. In this world where we’re always navigating these complex relationships, and forgiving, and accepting things that we’re not sure we should accept, and giving and taking and growing, and constantly trying to do the mental gymnastics that accompanies life in 2025, for the love of God why couldn’t you have just…made Laurie’s ending simple?

It’s a TV show! Have her tell her friends off! Give me the catharsis I crave! Tell the mean people that they’re bad! Make them feel bad! Stand up for yourself!

Or, more succinctly, do that which I will not do. For entertainment. For fun! Because The White Lotus is fiction!!

And the complexity of friendship is so freaking real.